domenica 20 giugno 2010

Houdini's 30 good intentions


embarrassing / irksome habits

#1 A cuddle every now and then will not kill me. They will not cuddle me forever and however is my fault because i'm beautiful.

#2
Be brushed to prevent hair balls is a good thing. I will not start running in circles around my human to avoid

#3
I'm a rabbit weighing one kilo. Cut my nails should not take two days, two people and two tranquilizers (for me).

#4
I do not need to jump in the tub while my human is take a bath, and scratch her because I'm wetting myself.

#5
It is nice to have a clean litter. I do not need to grunt, growl and bite my human every time she's cleaning it, until she reaches the point of locking myself in another room

#6
I really have to stop jumping on the couch when unsuspecting humans are sleeping on it.

#7
I will accept the traditional meaning of the word "NO!" without try constantly to redefine it.

#8
I do not break down on side with half-closed eyes imitationing dead rabbit.

#9
I do not wash my genitals in front of guests.

#10
I will not launch on human, grunting and digging with my legs when she trying to get my bowl: she tries to fill it, not steal it.

#11
My philosophy is no longer "what's yours is mine and what's mine is mine ONLY"

#12
All things under 30 cm are not mine because I've rubbed my chin.

#13
I will not think up misdeeds seems nice. I will think up assuming the appearance greedy rabbit.

#14
I must remember that I have huge feet with huge claws that can hurt the human skin.

#15
Humans are not very impressed by a rabbit that grunts and growls.

#16
I can not pass through walls, no matter how fast I can get.

Bodily functions

#17
I will not intentionally pee on people I dislike.

#18
I will not scratch the wax from the ears and then lick off the fingers of the big feet. #19 I will not spend the Christmas mounting on my companion in front of all the guests.

Destruction

#20 Eating the keyboard cable is not the best way to turn off the computer, even if the screensaver bothers me.

#21
I do not need to chew 20 cm below each frame. There are already enough fiber in my diet.

#22
I do not eat more buttons of the remote to the point that humans should use a pencil to press.

#23
The toilet paper is not decorative.

#24
A green cleaner is not a huge celery noisy, so I do not have to chase all over the house my human and celery noisy.

#25
The candles burn me * always * the whiskers: I have not put my nose in every time to check it.

Food

#26 I am a rabbit, and rabbits are herbivores. Then I do not need to steal the ham from sandwiches.

#27
I should be provided with a label "I eat everything I see, except what makes me good."

#28 I will not eat my strawberries so I tinged with red around the nose and look bloody.

#29
Vegetables are not best if I roll it in the litter.

#30
Just because the cat has stayed in my hay, not mean it is ruined.



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